Reasons to Remember Death

Perspective has been a big topic for me recently. I think it’s an important thing to have and can genuinely help people to live better lives. I mentioned this in my post: My Eulogy… a couple of days ago. It’s almost serendipitous (probably the incorrect word in this context…) that I find a video that builds upon this a couple of days later.

I have recently discovered the wonderful ‘School of Life’ videos. An unusual combination of entertaining, thoughtful and pragmatic; they explore philosophy, psychology, literature and art in order to help people live.

They state that they’re “devoted to emotional education”, the kind of things we’re never taught in school, but are essential to living life – love, work and being forgiving and patient with ourselves are some of the bigger topics they try to draw upon. If this sounds like you, I would thoroughly recommend looking at a couple of their videos.

At the time of writing they had just posted a video entitled ‘Reasons to Remember Death’. While it may seem (initially) quite a morbid topic to focus upon, it actually has a lot of power in focusing the mind and prioritising – much like writing one’s own Eulogy. We seem to almost obsess about issues that actually pale in comparison to the finality of death. Realising this can actually provide the perspective for us to live a little more freely, grasping the opportunity we have to do what we really want, and express how we really feel.

 

Writer’s Block

I was a little stuck on a topic to write tonight. What if I wrote something that people didn’t like? What if I posted something that people would judge me for? But then I remembered why I was writing this blog. I mean the primary reason, the reason I started this project and began typing in the first place: It is for me.

That’s it. A simple thought, but with a meaning I feel is grounded. A lot of content within social media, or blogs, or videos on YouTube, are rated by the number of ‘likes’ of ‘shares’ it gets. The more it gets, the more value it’s perceived to have – and that’s not what I’m trying to do here. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to get the ‘likes’, but it’s not the primary reason content should be produced. And that’s why the grounding thought was so valuable, it brought me back in focus.

It’s easy to get distracted by all the content out there, but having the piece of mind to stop every now and then, and to re-calibrate has begun to help me a lot recently. I suppose it comes down to what will matter in the end – will it make any difference if I post something that gets 100 likes or 0 likes? Probably not. But what will make a difference is if I write something that is true to how I’m feeling at the time. I’m being true to myself, in that moment. And surely that matters more.

 

A New Dawn – Origins

A couple of days ago I posted about A New Dawn, the RPG (D&D 5e) world that my friend and I have invented. Over the coming weeks we’ll be releasing, to the players, a few different documents covering the history, races and classes within our little universe.

I’m really proud with the way its turned out, and I wanted to share it. So, here’s the first document ‘Origins’. You’ll find out about the history of the A New Dawn universe, and we start to paint a picture of what life is like when our adventure starts, at the beginning of the 15th Century.

Here’s the Document – A New Dawn – Origins

If you have any feedback, please get in touch. I’d like to eventually start to share the stories and adventures of the characters as they make their way through the universe – but we’ve got some characters to make beforehand.

 

(I do have to mention that we did pilfer the pictures from the Numenera RPG as some of them fit reflected our universe quite well. But, as we’re not making any money off this then I don’t think it’s a problem!)

My Eulogy…

It’s an uncomfortable task to begin with. Writing something that you were never meant to write. But writing your own eulogy is a great way to put things in life in to perspective.  

I do this every now and then; when I’m feeling a little ‘swept away’ by life – when I’m just going through the motions. 

Get up. Go to work. Have dinner. Sleep. Repeat until weekend. 

It’s probably a pattern that a lot of people can relate to. But setting some time aside every few months to check in and reflect can put things back into perspective. I mean, no one in their eulogy is going to mention about the time they did overtime at work to get that project finished. Even if it does feel like the most important thing in the world at that time, and it’s causing you so much stress and pressure. In the grand scheme of things,  it’s not important.  

What most people will mention is the impact that you have on the people around you. How you made them feel. How their life was made better by having you in it. Sometimes it helps to be reminded of that. 

A New Dawn

‘A New Dawn’ is the title of the new Dungeons and Dragons campaign that my friend and I have been designing. We wanted something slightly different from the classic high fantasy setting, but something that still felt quite familiar.

So we set it in 15th century Persia (think Aladdin, Prince of Persia or Assassin’s Creed). We’ve created our own races, classes, geography and history. And I’ve been engrossed with the possibilities of story that could happen within this setting.

I am the Game Master for the campaign. This basically means that I will be acting as a combination of narrator, referee and improviser. There is something very exciting about building a world in which you’re going to let 5 characters loose in.

I’ve been thinking about how I might link this with continuing to improve my writing and I think I’ve come up with an idea. I’ll write up my notes from each session and summarise them in a story-format. This way it will help the players, but it also might prove to be entertaining reading – if we’re doing our jobs correctly! I’ll introduce the players and the setting and we’ll see how it goes.

I’ll be meeting with each of the players to develop their characters over the coming month, so hopefully we’ll have something to post then. I’m excited to see how this goes.

Wedding Season

I’m currently in my friend’s car getting a lift back after a long day of eating and drinking too much at my friend’s wedding. I’m going through a point in my life when a lot of my friends are getting married. And the inevitable question pops up at weddings: “so, when are you getting married?”.

I’m single, and have been for a number of years. But more and more the people who I see are in couples. The more that get married, the more that being single becomes a ‘thing’. This is a thing that i’m comfortable with normally, but in this context I feel like I need to explain myself. There’s almost an unwritten question of “why don’t you have a girlfriend?”, which I need to explain.

It’s weird when you think about it. I mean, I wouldn’t be able to ask “so, why are you guys together?”, “What made you choose your partner?”.

I’m currently coming back from a wedding with heavy eyes and aching feet. I drank, danced, held babies, socialised and reminisced. It was a lovely evening.

And yes, I’m still single.

Persistence, Persistence

Ambition is the path to success. Persistence is the vehicle you arrive in. – Bill Bradley

 

One of the reasons I started this blog is because I wanted to improve my writing. It wasn’t the only reason, but it was definitely one of them. I knew that the best way for me to do this was to write, and write often.

I made a promise to myself that I would try to write something – anything – everyday for at least 30 days. And here I am, on the third day with only 19 minutes left, finally getting round to writing this post. But, I am writing it.

Procrastination is an interesting concept when you think about it. A lot of people would label themselves as a ‘procrastinator’, leaving things to the last minute, needing to work under pressure. I don’t think that’s necessarily the case for me. Perhaps I’m scared of not producing a piece of work that is ‘good enough’. Whatever the reason, this was something I was motivated to do three days ago, and today it took me until I had less than half an hour in the day to get around to doing.

Until I reminded myself tonight of the reason I wanted to do this in the first place, I just couldn’t be bothered. I didn’t have a good enough topic to write about. I had too many other things I needed to do.

Sometimes in life you just need to take a step back and remind yourself why you’re doing something. Tonight that helped me write this. Is it world-changing? No. Is it the best bit of text ever written? No. But is it more than I was writing a week ago? Yes.

The Importance of Story

I have been thinking recently about the power stories have in our lives. When you look, stories are everywhere; music, film, books are obvious ones, but marketing, advertising, business brands, social media… even conversations are a form of story.

“What’s new?”

“How have you been?”

“What are you up to tonight?

… Tell me your story.

It’s interesting to think of the story we tell ourselves though. How we make sense of the world. The filter we see things through.

Are we essentially the author and main protagonist in our own ‘life story’?

Personally I find that to be an empowering thought. If I was writing this story – my story – would I have written today? What would I write for tomorrow? If the answer is “no” too many days in a row then perhaps it’s time to start writing a new chapter. The best stories have ups and downs; relatable, vulnerable, human characters; but ultimately characters to take action, who make a decision.

It’s also reassuring in the dips of life that the ‘Hero’s Journey’ always requires the hero to go through the ordeals before they are able to gain the reward.

Perhaps what I’m saying is that every now and then it’s worth stopping. Taking a moment and asking: “How’s my story going?”.

Jumping In

I have a confession to make. I have no idea what I’m doing.

I’m an avid researcher – into anything. Sometimes (and quite frequently) to the point of not actually getting anything done. I once heard it was called ‘Analysis Paralysis’, which I’m assuming comes from a desire to make sure that what you’re doing is ‘right’, and not look like an idiot. So, obviously that’s what I did when I first decided that I wanted to write a blog. “How to write a blog”, “Top 10 tips to make your blog awesome”, “Biggest mistakes new bloggers make”. There’s a lot of information that I could be reading. And a lot that I’ve already read. But here I am, ignoring all of the research and writing this stream of semi-consciousness. Hopefully it will emerge as a more ‘real’ experience than analysing my post through a ‘Top 10 Tips’ lens.

Perhaps what I write will turn into a point, perhaps not. But I think I’m OK with either. I’m going to explore, to try things out, to make mistakes. Who knows, it might be fun, I might learn something, and you know what… maybe others will too.

Until then though, me and my thoughts will have their own tiny little house in the vast universe that is the internet. It’s already starting to feel like home.